Heeding the Word of Wisdom

Huh.  Wisdom.  Sophia.  Goddess.  I never thought of that before... That's an interesting meditation!  And my friend, Dryad, pointed out that the WoW was prompted by Emma's request.  Iiiiinteresting.  But onward.


Doctrine and Covenants 89 (Emphases mine, blahblah)
 18 And all saints who remember to keep and do these sayings, walking in obedience to the commandments, shall receive health in their navel and marrow to their bones;

 19 And shall find wisdom and great treasures of knowledge, even hidden treasures;

 20 And shall run and not be weary, and shall walk and not faint.

The WoW (Word of Wisdom... not World of Warcrack) is one of my biggest pet peeves in the Church, and probably one of my biggest personal points of hypocrisy, because I am totally guilty of the stuff that bothers me.  There's a lot to be said for the fact that the Church does not micromanage us in the way we live this law, beyond the major Do Nots that can keep you from obtaining a temple recommend.  However, I don't think we manage ourselves at all on the less emphasized Dos.

• All wholesome herbs are for our constitution, nature, and use
• Eat seasonally  (Insert contemporary plug for eating locally, since we've lost that which they had no choice but to do in the early 1800s.)
• Eat prudently and thankfully
• Eat meat sparingly--it is pleasing to God that they be eaten "only in times of winter, cold or famine"
• Eat grains and fruits (This is back before "evils and designs... of conspiring men" genetically altered our food crops and the rise of rampant food allergies and sensitivities... okay, enough of that)

Including the directive from Section 88, verse 124 about sleep--which, while not explicitly part of the WoW, is certainly applicable to health matters--we're given about twice as many Dos than Do Nots, and we seem to have our emphasis flipped.  I'm as guilty of it as anyone, to be honest.  I stay up late (often whether I can afford to or not), eat junk food and too much meat.  I do use herbs and the like for healing and health, but eating seasonally or prudently, not so much.

So, what would happen to my ability to receive wisdom and knowledge, personal revelation about things presently hidden from me if I worked on the parts of the Word of Wisdom where I am less than diligent?  I think it's a worthwhile experiment.  I'm already working on going mostly-gluten-free, so cutting down sugar, increasing veggies, and sleeping more and earlier would probably be a good thing to boot.

Interesting that the way we are physically nourished (WoW, fasting) is so tied to how our spirits are nourished.  Especially when you consider the connection with women's traditional roles in most cultures as being the feeders and nourishers, nurturers, and this search for Mother, and the connection between the Feminine Divine and Wisdom.  Hmmmmmm... that is a LOT to consider!  ...Maybe this is the beginning of results from Sunday. :D

I shall let you know how the changes go!

My Preparation

Yesterday went off really well, I think.  From what I can tell from various places I've seen/heard of word of the Fast spread, I'm fairly certain there were at least a couple dozen people participating.  I never got a head count.  Part of me wants to start a Facebook page or private group, but that's for another day.  I'm not up to thinking about it right now.

As far as my experience yesterday went, it was... unusual for me.  I don't want to sound like I'm bragging, I'm not, but normally when I fast, I find inspiration comes with relative ease.  I feel like I have better answers at Church, like I can think more deeply, more quickly.  Yesterday I felt... not that way.  I don't know if I felt stumped or just normal.  I know I was looking for ways and times to try and talk about Heavenly Mother, and I found virtually none except the briefest mention in a talk I gave.  Maybe that was for the best.  It would've been largely for the sake of my ego, speaking of Her, trying to make a point.  That's one of my biggest struggles, to keep my motivations as pure as possible.  It's part of why I hesitated to call this a "movement": I don't want it to be seen as some political drive rather than a collective quest for spiritual light and understanding.  However, even that is a movement, so I guess I have to call it what it is.

Anyway, there is no room for my ego in this (says the blogger...), so I feel that I have no place trying to force the issue when it doesn't come naturally or when the Spirit doesn't make it apparent.  It never felt natural, I never felt impressed to share, and as I contemplated that fact after Church, I realized that my own heart has a lot of preparation left.

I'm still afraid.  I'm still nervous.  I still doubt and question myself regularly.  Should I really be doing this?  Is it time?  Am I jumping the gun?  What if She isn't supposed to be revealed: until the end, or at all?  What if my Stake President/Bishop/Dad (who's on the High Council) finds out?  What if I'm disciplined?  Stupid things, things I shouldn't be worrying about if I have faith, and if this path is right.  Worry stresses; it doesn't help.  But this is my journey just as much as it's our journey as a people, as a church, and while my heart has been opened, there is a lot of sweeping out and reorganizing to do.

I see that as a pattern in the larger Church membership, as well, and it's hard to fight the despair.  Am I jumping the gun?  Is it too soon?  Am I too eager?  I don't believe any act of faith will diminish me personally, or anyone who participates, but there is so much work involved for this to be successful.  It's very easy to look at that mountain and feel my heart sink.  However... the only way I currently have to make that mountain move is to climb it and put it under my feet.  (Credit Cherie Call for that perspective.)  And really, who has more invested in keeping women subjugated and the Female half of the Divine Union suppressed than the Adversary?  He is the source of such fears and doubts.

I can't afford to give in to that.  I won't give in to that.  I need preparation and strength if I'm to pursue this course, seek this miracle, arise from the dust and cast off the chains with which I have been bound.

Miracles

Totally ripping this off the Bible Dictionary.  Emphases and interpolations mine, etc etc.

Miracles

An important element in the work of Jesus Christ, being not only divine acts, but forming also a part of the divine teaching. Christianity is founded on the greatest of all miracles, the resurrection of our Lord. If that be admitted, other miracles cease to be improbable [including the coming forth of revelation on Heavenly Mother.] Miracles should not be regarded as deviations from the ordinary course of nature so much as manifestations of divine or spiritual power. Some lower law was in each case superseded by the action of a higher. [...]  Miracles were and are a response to faith, and its best encouragement. They were never wrought without prayer, felt need, and faith.

[...]

Miracles are a part of the gospel of Jesus Christ. If miracles cease it is because faith has ceased. See Mark 6:5–6; Morm. 9:10–20; Ether 12:12.

 *****

I hope everyone's Fast is going well today, and that our faith is strong.  At the very least, I hope our desire for faith is strong.  I believe everyone participating feels the need we have for this knowledge to come forth.  May our hearts be prepared, and may we find those whose hearts are prepared to join their faith with ours as well.

For some excellent scriptures and hymns adapted to acknowledge both God and Goddess, Father and Mother, take a Sunday stroll over to With Your Mutual Approbation.  Be strong, have faith, remember how much you are loved, and I hope everyone has a wonderful Sabbath day.

Mother Fast 1: Preparation

Have you noticed the snazzy page I created to be an ongoing reminder?  It's right up there. ^  It's probably the easiest thing to link to as you share this movement with others.

Depending on how you fast, some time tonight is likely to be the beginning.  I won't dictate how anyone fasts; I just ask that in whatever manner you do it, it shows a willingness to sacrifice or set aside in favor of receiving blessings.  The amount of faith and effort we put forth will be directly proportionate to the quality of answers we receive.

Okay, enough lecture.

Suggested subject: Fast and pray primarily for the preparation of our people and our leaders to receive revelation about Heavenly Mother, and an increased desire in our hearts to know her and about her.
If you feel prompted to add something or concentrate a related subject, feel free, but as a group, I would like to focus our collective intention and faith on these things.  Please also contemplate whom you could share this movement with, who would be sympathetic and interested in participating.  We're as much missionaries to each other as we are to others.

I'd love to hear any stories and experiences you have this weekend and in the coming days, if you feel like sharing them in the comments.  Thank you in advance for your time, sacrifice, and faith!

Work and Worship in the House of the Lord

As noted in a previous post, I served for two years in the Oakland Temple as a volunteer and as an ordinance worker (which, in my opinion, is basically a priestess with a gender-neutral title.)  I was struck early on by how different I felt working from how I felt worshiping.

As a patron, one usually attends the temple in order to advance spiritually in some way, whether by practicing obedience, serving those who have passed before us without a chance to take on their covenants, or through contemplation, meditation, prayer, learning, or simply by having a place to shut out the world and find peace.  There's a lot of secondary reasons for going to the temple, but I think "intent to progress" is the primary idea.  You're there--hopefully--to find a connection with the Divine in some way or other, and I usually feel... for lack of a better analogy coming to mind, like a consumer.  I'm here, I know what I'm seeking can be found here, and I'm present to partake, and serve someone's ancestor (occasionally my own) in the process.

As a worker, I'm there to... work.  And while this will sound obvious, it always felt like I was going to work; work just happened to be a holy place.  I had a schedule of where to be and when, duties for various places I was assigned, things I had to remember to do or not do, policies, practices, etc.  Moving from place to place was a matter of course rather than a process of preparation.  This was most apparent with the Celestial Room.  I remember entering it for the first time as a worker (duties included directing people to various exits, maintaining the reverence of the room, and being a gracious presence and "a hostess in the House of the Lord") and being struck not only with the lack of external ceremony (simply entering without having attended an ordinance) but how much it felt as though... I already belonged there.

As a worshipper, a patron, there is a process you must go through to get there, a progression.  As a worker, there isn't.  Not that I was suddenly given all knowledge, wisdom, understanding, worthiness, and perfection when I was set apart (HA! If only!) but holy ground became my  home ground.  It became my native place more than ever, where I belonged to it and where it belonged to me.  I can only describe the difference in feeling as becoming a part of that environment, one among the host of seen and unseen angels that work there.

I miss it. I know where I am now and what I'm doing here closer to home is where I belong, but I miss the peace of being there so regularly.  It was my grove, my bower, my sanctuary.  I could use that right now, with all that I'm going through. I should carve out the time to attend on Saturday, to prepare myself and seek the peace, confirmation, and courage I need for this... project, movement, journey, path, whatever it is that lies before me.

Just late night thoughts...

I can see the waxing gibbous moon hanging in the southwest through an auric veil of fog and the branches of a beloved redwood, and painfully my heart cries for Her... "Mother!"
***
If we're invested in doing the work of God and making sure indeed that the Priesthood authority is never taken from the Earth, wouldn't it make an awful lot of sense for it to be held by the ones who, as a group, are statistically the MOST likely to be devout, the most likely to use it to better humanity?  Haven't we proved ourselves MORE than capable of blessing and laboring even without it?
***
I've held onto the thought for years that men have the Priesthood in order to make them more like women: more devout, more serving, more compassionate and merciful.  I love that idea, but I need to reexamine it.  May the men just failed. Maybe the idea is wrong.  I don't know.

That's all for right now.  Good night.

I got so angry today (Updated)

I've finally been reading The Dance of the Dissident Daughter (If you buy, please buy via The Amethyst Network's Amazon widget), having received a distinct spiritual kick in the butt that I was haring off into the awakening adventure of mine with entirely too little preparation.  So far, I enjoy the book and it has a lot of beautiful information, it is not the end-all-be-all of this path.  However, it has begun to turn the lock.

I was driving to take care of some business in the next city over, contemplating what I'd read and my own thoughts, and I began to pray, puzzling over Why.  I usually try not to ask Why, but What Can I Learn--well before a Conference talk last year to that effect, pretty much since going through a bad relationship several years ago--but I just can't seem to escape it.  Why.  Why do we know so little about God the Mother?  We're Her children, Her daughters.  We're allowed to know a decent amount about other sacred subjects, namely everything that goes on in the temples.  The foundations are laid there for women and men to become like our Parents.  It's sacred stuff.  Is Mother, is Goddess more sacred than that?  Why?  How?  The old saw about her being too sacred to be talked about (which, incidentally, is NOT an endorsed, official position; we seem to have taken it on ourselves as a people) just doesn't stand up.

And the truth burst forth, burning from my lips like a phoenix from a cage.  "Because that's the greatest desecration of all!  It has already happened!"  She has been erased, written out, suppressed, oppressed, and the very idea of her existence ignorantly reviled for millenia, forced to submit beneath the iron fist of unrighteous patriarchy.  Throughout the centuries, mortal men undertook to squelch virtually all mention of Her, practically every hint under the umbrella of Judeo-Christian tradition, denying women equally standing and prestige in every particular of their religious, social, and cultural lives, even to the point of murder.  Can there be a more perfect example of desecration than intentional defamation and systematic annihilation?  She has already been disrespected and abused by her children.  Many who should revere Her sneer at the concept that She exists.  They fight it.  Silence can be no protection from the abuse that silence begets.

So I prayed and I pled, "Make Her known!  Bring Her forth and unveil her face!"  I quickly realized, however, that such revelation would do very little good as yet.  We, as a people, are mired in bitterness and apostasy--literally standing apart from the principle--where She is concerned, and our men are deeply affected.  The apparent imbalance in practical representation of Deity only reinforces the ideologies they've been given.  So I pled for them.  "God Almighty, open the hearts of the men.  Soften their hearts toward their Mother.  Help them to accept Her when she is revealed."  But I couldn't deny that, whether the men ever get it or not, the women have been wronged.  Deeply, horribly wronged.  We have had inferiority projected and enforced upon us.  For thousands of years, billions of men, billions of women; the lack of the Feminine Divine has wounded everyone it touches.  So I pled for justice, for some sort of restitution to be made on behalf of the hated daughters of Eve, for our abuse to end, for us to be finally seen as equals.

I rarely rail in my prayers, but today I did, shouting and weeping with indignation at the sheer injustice of what we've had thrust upon us simply because we lack a penis, because we have a womb.  It is deeply unfair, but so help me, it is not "just the way it is."  This was done intentionally, centuries ago, by men who then passed it on to not only their sons, but their daughters as well.

"TRADITIOOOOOON!"

Many of the traditions we carry are good, beneficial, and beautiful, but the erasure of Goddess and the oppression of women are not.  It's time for this to stop.  It's time for us to "arise from the dust, my sisters, and be women, and be determined in one mind and in one heart, united in all things, that we may not remain in captivity." Indeed, "Awake, my sisters; put on our armor of righteousness.  Shake off the chains with which we are bound, and come forth out of obscurity, and arise from the dust."  (Likened from 2 Nephi 1:21, 23)  It's interesting that the above words in their original form were spoken to Laman and Lemuel as their father's dying plea for them to spiritually awaken, to be strong, to reverse direction on the dark path down which they have travelled.  Laman and Lemuel chose to be proud, to reject their traditions to the point that God lost favor with them and they lost favor with God; Women had no choice in having their rights and power stripped away by men.

The Fast begins in a few days.  I find myself approaching this even with a growing sense of the daunting task it represents.  I know this is important, this work to ask for greater light and knowledge, for the Restoration of our Goddess into the official record, not as a point of doctrine used to provide leverage in proving a moral point, or lumped in as one half of our Parents, presented only in relation to Heavenly Father, but a Divine Being in Her own right.  This work is more important than the gross majority of us realize and it cannot be accomplished without great effort.  Perhaps many of the women who read this (if they read this far) will not realize how deep that need is, and would call me subversive, blasphemous, or foolish.  I cannot blame them; I cannot hold their conditioning against them.  I've been conditioned the same way and I struggle under the same burden.

I still believe.  Deeply.  I am still strong in my faith, with a strong conviction that this Church is where I belong, that it is where the most important eternal truths and proper authority can be found.  That, however, does not negate or excuse the problems that exist because of our mortal imperfections and weaknesses.  Indeed, if we were a perfect people, we would have been taken up.  Until that happens, we still have improvements to make, things we can all learn and do better, and traditions to overcome.

*Updated to add references, clarify a few statements and make minor grammatical changes